Tuesday, September 12, 2006

I'm taking a poll

But first, a story. Sunday night I don't know what my deal was. Actually it was Monday morning I guess. We had Taco Bell for supper so maybe that was my problem. But anyways, I woke up sometime in the early morning from all these wacked out dreams I was having. You know those nights where you dream stupid things all night long and you don't know where any of the stuff is coming from? Anyways, I don't know if I saw a shadow or if it was something sitting in my floor, but I was totally convinced that there was a skunk in my room. First I just couldn't figure out how in the world it could have gotten in. And also I started completely freaking out. I mean really freaking out. To the point where I was actually praying that the skunk wouldn't attack me or start spraying everywhere. Or that I could somehow at least get out of the room before he did start spraying. I just really didn't want to bathe in tomato juice. Then I fell asleep again but was really restless until I got up for the day. It wasn't until I was fully awake and it was light out that I was convinced there was no skunk. I still am not sure why or how it all happened. Okay now onto the poll. So far I have gotten along really well with Melissa. But there is one thing that we don't agree on. Does the toilet paper go over the roll or under the roll? I won't say which side I'm on until I see what all of you say. Roommates, don't tell everybody which way I am. This issue has caused quite the turmoil. Okay not really but it is the first thing we found that we don't agree on. It was good to talk to some of you tonight who were at volleyball. Looking forward to seeing a lot of you this weekend!

26 comments:

Maryann said...

OVER, OVER, OVER.

You can count my as three votes. :-)

Anonymous said...

Sarah,
UNDER, UNDER, UNDER UNDER. It pulls out better if it's under. Count mine as four votes. Under has it by one. Sorry Mare.
Dad

Luke said...

Definitely over. Two reasons:

1. You can actually see where the roll starts on those occasions where the loose end is clinging tightly to the roll.

2. It's closer to your hand.

If your hand is moving at 3 feet per second towards the toliet paper, and you have to reach an extra 4 inches to the toilet paper, that's over 1/10 of a second wasted every time you reach for the roll.

Assuming you reach for the roll an average of 3 times per sitting, that's 3/10 of a second wasted per sitting.

If you sit an average of once per day for your entire life, (assuming an average lifespan of 76 years with 73 of them being the "sitting" years) that's 7,993.5 seconds completely wasted. That's 133.225 minutes, or 2.22 hours that you could've been doing something MUCH more productive than reaching for the toilet paper.

And that's not even mentioning the extra muscle movement required resulting in added wear-and-tear on the body.

Becs said...

Can't say that I have ever noticed. I just put it on whatever way it happens to land and pay no attention to it. I guess that means you can count me for both. :)

sarah said...

Luke. PLEASE tell me you did not actually sit down and figure that one out.

Anonymous said...

Sarah,
I'm sure that your weird dreams and TP woes are all results of separtation anxiety from me. It's understandable, and a common thing for women who move away from me. The easiest thing to rid yourself of this malady is to eat chocolate ice cream while standing on your head, and breathe out of your nose. Believe me, it will be worth it when you're done! Look forward to seeing you soon.

Anonymous said...

it seems to me that luke only calculated the use of toilet paper for a guy. so either way you put it on the roll he's off

Anonymous said...

Sarah, I just sat a little while ago and I payed special attention when I reached and was so glad it was under. It was so easy to pull and tear off. Also the extra 1/10 of a second was well worth the extra exercise you can get by reaching a little farther. Under is definitely the way to go.

Heidi said...

Over...it HAS to be over. I know this is weird, but if it's not over, I switch it. :P

Luke said...

Sarah: Yep, I calculated it all out.

Anonymous: The problem would only be compounded for women. I tried to use averages, but the point stays the same. Wasted time.

Dad: You might not miss that 1/10 of a second now...but just you wait until you're 76. You may look back and wish you had that extra 2.22 hours to spend with your kids/grandkids. :-)


Ok, probably not.

Anonymous said...

Dear Sarah,

I really think either way works as long as you get the job done.

Some considerations:

If you hang it over, you can see the print if there is one and make those nice little triangles like fancy hotels do.

Also, hanging it over is more sanitary as your hands are not as apt to touch the wall behind the roll. You should however, hold the roll with your one wrist and break off the paper with your other hand rather than letting both hands touch the paper. This keeps the paper more germ free.

You do not have a pet, especially a cat, but should you get one, then under may be the better choice, as a cat can grab on an "over the top" roll and keep unravelling it, but isn't so talented with an "under" roll.

So there you have it. I really do not personally have a favorite, but as I think about it, I usually tend to have it roll over the top. I really should try the triangle trick.

I love you and God bless you,

Mom

Anonymous said...

PS - It seems Dad and I differ on this issue a bit too, as he prefers under and I usually do the over thing, but we have been together 26 years now and still love each other bunches and bunches, so I think you and Melissa will be able to work this dilemma out. Your are in our prayers!! :)

Hey, also Steeves called us a 6 AM this morning. He asked about you and was in awe that you now live so far away.

Mom

megs said...

over. go over!! oh and luke, the average person goes to the bathroom 6 times a day. now granted boys don't always sit so let's jsut take half of that for an average and you're goign to have to do some re-calculations. if MY calculations were correct (assuming that yours were, of course) that is 6.66 hours of wasted time!! WOW!!

sarah i'm REALLY excited to see you!!

Luke said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Luke said...

Like I said, the problem would just compounded. I tried to use conservative estimates so people wouldn't accuse me of inflating the numbers just to prove my point. *grin*

I'm such a good little scientist no?

Angie said...

I must say it was a privelege to hear the skunk story first over the phone before I read it. The overall effect was outright hilarious.
***
I do tend to steer towards "over the top". Me and my friends used to actually argue about this in high school. Ahh the days of youth.

Anonymous said...

Well, before i was married, i didn't rightly know which way was which. but my wife's got me potty trained, if you will...to put the roll over the top. i'm kinda anal about it now. ... um. moving on.
(you all were thinking it)
I had a dream like that once...'cept it wasn't a skunk and it wasn't on the floor. it was a bunch of creepy crawly spiders on the top bunk...i actually got out of bed in a panic and woke up my brothers. about the time they got to their senses, so did i...and i dismissed the fact that there was something terribly wrong with my head that night. i was like 8.

the end.
Robedias

Anonymous said...

Luke may be right about the extra reach time, but he failed to add in the extra tear off time involed in the over position. I did a scientific experiment the last time I sat and found that it takes almost a full second longer to tear off over mounted tp as compared to under mounted tp. When tearing off under mounted, you can hold the roll so it stops rolling out with your wrist while tearing off what you need with just a slight movement of the same hand, leaving a short tail to grab and pull out the next time. When you finally get the over the top torn off the end is usually stuck to the roll and you can spend up to three more seconds getting a hold of the end for your next pull.

Obviously all the poeple who prefer over, don't value their time and energy as much as I do mine. I hope the time I've spent evaluating toilet paper mounting positions has been helpful, and that you and Melissa can come to agreement on the superior method of under.

I really need to get back to more important work now. Mali

Anonymous said...

Wow, I never new that the way you place the toilet paper on the roll was such a big deal. Worthy enough even for calculations and scientific experiments. It's a sad sad world... ... ...

Luke said...

Erin: The only reason it's a "sad sad world" is because so many people reject the obvious superiority of over the top toilet paper.

Anonymous said...

Dear Sarah,

I have made another observation. You and Melissa can both be happy. If you'll notice, the roll can be taken off either over OR under depending on which way you take it from. If you roll the roll toward the wall it appears to be going one way, but if you roll it the other way, it appears to be going the opposite direction.
In our case, toward the wall seems over, and toward the toilet seems under because ever since you started this poll, the roll gets mysteriously switched if not going in your father's favorite direction. So, being submissive, as according to God's Plan, I have decided to simply keep it on Dad's preferred way. I suppose you could say that as for we and our house, we shall roll the paper under.

We love you dear Sarah and miss you. You remain in our prayers daily. Have a great week! God bless you forever!!

Mom

Anonymous said...

Dear Sarah,

I have made another observation. You and Melissa can both be happy. If you'll notice, the roll can be taken off either over OR under depending on which way you take it from. If you roll the roll toward the wall it appears to be going one way, but if you roll it the other way, it appears to be going the opposite direction.
In our case, toward the wall seems over, and toward the toilet seems under because ever since you started this poll, the roll gets mysteriously switched if not going in your father's favorite direction. So, being submissive, as according to God's Plan, I have decided to simply keep it on Dad's preferred way. I suppose you could say that as for we and our house, we shall roll the paper under.

We love you dear Sarah and miss you. You remain in our prayers daily. Have a great week! God bless you forever!!

Mom

Anonymous said...

Sorry,

I did not mean to send this twice and do not know how to delete one. Oh, well. Love you and God bless you.

Mom

Anonymous said...

I'm back into reading your blog, Sarah, now that you are so far away. As for the toilet paper... well, you know how I feel. And as normal, we have completely opposite ideas!

rebekah

jw said...

this horse should be dead but OVER! Hands down, it's not even an opinion:)

andrew k said...

Sideways, obviously. It also includes the added bonus of making the TP roll far easier to change out when the inevitable happens. Also you can more readily use both hands, change hands, or do whatever. Sideways is not only a great compromise, it also adds flexibility.